Thursday, August 03, 2006

Are You My Boyfriend?

The female subconscious is a powerful thing. If you are to begin the process of seeking a healthier relationship, it is vital that you ‘reprogram’. We have thus devised a simple, yet effective, regimen of videos that will help you. Instead of Retail Therapy we suggest Rental Therapy

Rental Therapy

The subconscious is a powerful tool that can be harnessed to help you seek kind men and to discern which men are boobs, unworthy of your attentions or affections. It is important to remember that ambivalent men are Jeckyll and Hyde type creates, prone to extreme shifts in behavior. Sometimes you think because your man looks the same as he did yesterday, that he is the same person inside. For most people, that would be a safe assumption to made. If you are dating an ambivalent man, however, this assumption could very well cost you your sanity.

It is important to recognize your boyfriend could actually be two (or more different people) lurking in the same body cavity. One of those people might be kind and generous—your dream man. The other one, however, might just be an insane, ego-destroying, maniac so self-involved and commitment-phobic that he makes Dennis Rodman look like Ghandi.

It is extremely difficult, however, for the average woman to recognize this. Therefore, we have come up with the following video program designed to help your subconscious to begin that oh-so-important process of discerning who your boyfriend really is. Movies contribute to this problem a great deal as men who are knights in shining armor on the silver screen are often scarecrows riding donkeys in real life. Consider the following "Reel Life" vs. "Real Life" scenarios:

1. Hugh Grant in Notting Hill vs. Hugh Grant getting arrested for solicing a prostitute on the Sunset Strip in real life.

2. Mel Gibson in Braveheart vs. Mel Gibson the anti-semetic, drunk driving lunatic.

3. Tom "you complete me" Cruise in Jerry M. vs. The crazy lunatic Scientologist control freak.

4. Ryan O'Neil in Love Story vs. Ryan O'Neil the abusive crazy father and cheating spouse.

5. Bill Cosby on the Cosby Show vs. Bill Cosby the cheating, chester-molester.

6. Charlie Sheen on 2and 1/2 Men vs. Cheating, crazy, rage-aholic husband of Denise.

7. Brad Pitt in Meet Joe Black vs...well, you know....

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

You mean men are real people too, and not just heroic characters in women's personal fantasies? Say it ain't so!

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